Racism Sucks: Eminem Has The Tightest Rhyme Ever But We Won’t Ever Hear It Because It Rhymes With The N-Word
Last week, one of the staffers at FLEXX Mag was granted the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to sit down with rap god, Eminem. The following is an excerpt from that interview:
FLEXX: So, Eminem. I would be remiss if I didn’t ask you this question while I have you.
Eminem: Go ahead.
F: So, you’re white.
E: Yes.
F: And you’re a rapper.
E: Right.
F: How have you never once used the N-word?
E: [Laughs] That’s a good question. I think it’s really just a respect thing. Hip Hop was created by black people. I’m just a visitor. When two black people use the word, there’s a different context then if I use it. The historical context of me using the word is inherently evil.
F: Wow, respect. So you’re telling me you’ve never even once thought of a rhyme that had the word?
E: Oh no. I have. The thoughts happen accidentally, ya know?
F: Oh, so you’ve just chosen to never put it in a song?
E: Exactly, out of respect.
F: I see. So was this a one time occurrence or-
E: Oh no. It’s happened several thousand times.
F: Excuse me?
E: I’ve written over eleven thousand bars that utilize the N-word.
F: Really?
E: Yeah, I just really love language, and wordplay, etc.
F: So, are these rhymes all in your head?
E: No, of course not. I wrote them all down in hundreds of composition books over the years.
F: If you had to ballpark, how many compositions books?
E: 576
F: Jesus.
E: And counting.
F: Christ.
E: Yeah, I’m quite prolific.
F: Where are the composition books?
E: Well, I have them all in a vault that I visit once a year. I pay 3 men to stand outside and defend it at all times.
F: Where is the vault?
E: [Laughs] Sorry, I can’t tell you that.
F: So are these composition books filled with just random rhymes or-
E: No. I have about 5 cohesive albums. One of them is a concept album where I imagine what life would be like if I were a black male. One if I were a black women. One if I were Tiger Woods. And the others are just typical me stuff, hating my mom, beating women, you know. I must say, it's some of my most political and incisive work to date. Too bad it'll never see the light of day.
F: Why not?
E: White people can’t say the N-word, period. End of discussion
F: Wow. You really are passionate about this.
E: African-Americans in this country have gone through so much. I want to do anything I can to help alleviate that pain.
F: So, how do you feel now looking back at your lyrics about women?
E: I stand by every single word. Fuck all women.
E's PUBLICIST: This interview is over.
